A long time ago, I read an article stating that seducing at the workplace could be a source of problems. At that time, I was young, and I thought it made sense. Thus, I thought I had to stay away from seducing women at the workplace. However, my opinion changed when I started to travel and worked in different places all over the world. I discovered the workplace was among the best places to meet attractive women. By the way, I think that the cute & busy working woman who looks for a man on an online dating site is an urban legend.
Thus, I thought: “How is it possible to seduce women at the office without getting in trouble?”.
If you are interested in a female co-worker, don’t impair your chances. Don’t try to seduce her at the workplace directly and never mention your interest to other co-workers. If you already talked to one coworker about your interest in a female coworker, stop it right now. You never know what a co-worker reaction will be. Perhaps, he or she will tell everybody about your interest. She or he will get jealous and will try to ruin your efforts. In 100% of cases, co-workers haven’t a useful role in seducing and dating a co-worker. Plus, there should be no intermediaries between yourself and a woman.
Follow a private detective approach. Be discreet and try to get as many information about her as you can get about her. Don’t be ashamed of gathering as much information as you can about her: schedule, private home address, hobbies, sports…
First of all, take her full name. At the office, it is often about knowing her prefix number and then looking into the intranet directory. Google it, and you may find interesting information. Search for her name in the local white papers to know where she lives. Try to know what her hobbies are. You may also read her tweets, her Facebook page… The more you know about her and the better it is.
The goal is to meet her outside of the office thanks to the information you gathered. If the Internet is not helpful, you may perhaps get better information from her co-workers. For instance, get closer to a coworker, and get information about your target (without telling your motivations for sure).
Once you have enough information, you have to speak to her outside of the office directly. Never try to discuss on the internet. In my experience, online chat was never helpful. At the workplace, Just smile and be courteous to her if you see her. Do simple things to get noticed. That’s all. In my own experience, I noticed a big change of personality whether I met a woman outside of the office or at the workplace. Many women were very cold and distant at the office and very welcoming and open-minded outside of the office.
If you start to talk to her at the coffee machine within the workplace, you may impair your chances of going forward because you will create a co-worker relationship. The more you get into a co-worker relationship and the more it is difficult to turn this relationship into a relationship for dating.
Don’t take any risks. As I said before, gather as much information as you can even if the information is not useful at first sight. Always get in touch with your target outside the office. Regarding relationship, you should get closer to your target outside the office. The office is a small society, just like a small village, where one understands each other intentions. On the other hand, if you meet her at a place like a salsa school, you will not be exposed to any risks because there are no external “threats” against your dating plan or your job position.
The relationship does not exist as long as you didn’t meet her outside the office. The starting point of the relationship is outside the office.
Why this advice?
2 times I have noticed it was dangerous to date women at the workplace. The first one that was when one of my friends worked in a hostel. A girl gave him her phone number. Then, he texted a very nice text telling he wanted to date her. Then, this psycho girl talked to the manager of my friend saying it was some type of harassment.
At my office, there was an employee who was also a supermodel. My closest coworker didn’t stop telling things to discourage me to pick her up as we talked about her. After thinking back, I discovered that ALL my coworkers had a bad influence when it came to dating women at work. This didn’t happen only once. I am sure there are other stories that happened in my back.
Also, if something goes wrong outside of your workplace, there is no danger for your job position.